I'm not Jealous!
by Darklycopene
Summary: Rigleen oneshot. What happens when Rigby finds out Eileen has a date?


Hey guys! So I really love Regular Show, and Rigleen is most defs my OTP for that show! So I figured, there had to be a way to get them together that didn't involve Eileen taking her glasses off!

Enjoy! Please RxR!

* * *

"Dude, Benson is totally working us to death!" Rigby complained as he and his friend strode into the coffee shop.

"Dude, I know." Mordecai replied. "But that's why we're having a _coffee break_."

They found their regular seats and waited for Margaret and Eileen to pour them a cup of coffee. Sure enough, Margaret appeared with a jug of black, freshly brewed coffee.

"Here you go guys!" She said as she poured the coffee into their cups.

"Thanks Margaret." Rigby and Mordecai chimed, smelling the soothing aroma of the coffee.

Margaret smiled, "No problem! Oh, and Mordecai, are we still on for that date tonight?"

Mordecai stopped sipping at his cup of coffee and grinned at her, "Wouldn't miss it for the world!"

"Great!" She replied. "Well, there are heaps of customers today, so I'll see you guys later!" She said, rushing off.

Mordecai raised his mug in the air, "Cooooofffeeeee!"

Rigby grinned and lifted his mug too, "Yeah-uh!" and with that, took a hearty swig.

"So dude, I didn't know we were going out tonight! I thought we were going out with the girls on Friday night." Rigby said, putting his mug on the table.

"What? Oh. Yeah, we're totally going out on Friday. It's just me and Margaret tonight. We're going to the lake, apparently there's a firefly hatching or something." Mordecai said, taking a loud slurp. "Margaret says it's really pretty."

Rigby groaned and threw his hands up. "Well what am _I _supposed to do, then?"

Mordecai raised an eyebrow, "Dude. I dunno, play video games with Pops?"

"You know Pops doesn't play video games!" Rigby said, picking up his mug again and taking another mouthful.

Mordecai shrugged. "Dude, all I know is I've finished this cup of coffee and I need more."

Rigby rolled his eyes, "So call your girlfriend over and get her to give us some more."

"Dude, didn't you hear her, she's busy. Nah, I'll get Eileen." He said, calling for her.

As Eileen walked over, Mordecai nudged at Rigby, "Maybe _you and Eileen_ can go out tonight."

Rigby looked at his best friend in horror, "What?! I-"

"Hey Mordecai, hey Rigby! Here's your coffee!" Eileen said, pouring the coffee into their mugs. "How's everything going today, guys?"

"Whatever." Muttered Rigby.

"Hey Eileen, good!" Mordecai said, punching Rigby on the shoulder.

"Ow! Dude! What was that for?" Rigby said, rubbing his injury.

Mordecai ignored Rigby's outburst and looked at Eileen. "So Eileen. Margaret and I are going on a date tonight, and Rigby's gonna be left all alone, did you two want to go see a movie or something?"

Rigby's mouth fell open at Mordecai's offer. "Dude! I-"

"Oh! Sorry, I can't. I have a date!" She said cheerily, before realising she had interrupted Rigby. "Sorry Rigby, what were you going to say?"

Rigby opened and closed his mouth several times before speaking. "I, uh. You've got a date? With who?"

"A guy from my astronomy club! We're charting stars at Lookout Mountain!" Eileen responded, pushing her glasses up her nose.

"Wow, Eileen! That's great. For you." Mordecai said, turning to look at Rigby.

Rigby scowled at Mordecai. As he opened his mouth to speak, Margaret yelled from the cashier. "Eileen, can I get some help?"

"Sorry guys, gotta run! Enjoy your coffee, and have fun on your date tonight Mordecai!" She said, dashing off to the kitchen.

The two sat in silence for a while before Mordecai spoke. "Looks like you missed your chance, dude. She's got a _date_."

Rigby groaned and threw his hands up in the air, "Whatever, dude. I didn't even _want _to see a movie tonight."

Rigby lifted himself from his chair and started to walk out of the coffee shop. "Dude, where are you going?" Mordecai called after him.

"Back to work. " He replied shortly.

Mordecai looked at their half full coffee cups, and groaning, got up to follow Rigby.

* * *

The rest of the day went fairly quickly at the park for Mordecai and Rigby. They finished their jobs in record time, as Rigby had barely said anything to the blue jay, instead working diligently in silence, a scowl on his face. As they were walking back to the house, Mordecai stopped.

"Dude. What's with you? You're bumming me out."

Rigby continued to walk toward the house. "Nothing. I'm just tired."

Mordecai put a hand on his hip. "Dude, you're not fooling anyone. You haven't said 'dude' all day, you've barely cracked a joke, and on top of all that, you're actually _doing _your work!" He said, counting each point on his free hand.

Rigby stopped walking and spun around. "I told you. I'm just tired." He turned again and continued walking toward the house. "Let's just get a sandwich."

Mordecai began to follow him reluctantly, and they soon were in the kitchen, grabbing ingredients for their sandwich. As they were assembling, Benson marched into the room.

"What are you two slackers doing now?! I thought I told you to rake the leaves next to the lake!" He said, throwing clipboard filled hands into the air.

"We're finished." Rigby replied, not looking up from making his snack.

"Oh really." Benson said, his disbelief obvious. "Well what about cleaning the male toilets?"

"Done." Rigby answered in monotone.

Benson's eyebrows knitted together. "Cleaning out the leaves in the gutters?"

Rigby sighed heavily. "Done, Benson."

Benson squinted his eyes, "Well what about the-"

"Benson! It's all done! The mowing, the pruning, picking up the road-kill and cleaning the cart! We're _done!_" Rigby yelled.

Mordecai lifted up his hands and grinned sheepishly. "I think what Rigby meant to say was that we worked really hard today, and now we're finished."

Benson looked slowly from Mordecai, to Rigby, and back to Mordecai. "Alright. But if there's _anything_ left to do, and you're lying to me, you're **fired**_!" _ And with that, Benson left the kitchen, returning to his office.

Mordecai sighed heavily and looked at Rigby. "Dude, what the H! I know you're upset about Eileen having a date, but you don't need to take it out on everybody we see!"

"I'm not upset about Eileen having a date! I don't even _care _if Eileen has a date! The dude is probably a sleazy nerd, anyway." Rigby replied.

"Dude. If you're so jealous, why don't you say something to her?" Mordecai said.

Rigby rolled his eyes and slammed his hands on his hips. "It took you like two years to say something to Margaret! And I'm not jealous!"

Mordecai shrugged nonchalantly, "Whatever, dude. I'm just trying to help. I gotta get ready for my date with Margaret."

Mordecai walked out of the kitchen and up to their bedroom. "No doubt to put on his only party shirt." Rigby thought bitterly, as he finished assembling his sandwich. He sat at the kitchen table, looking at it, his mind vacant of any coherent thought.

"Yo dude! Let me in on that sandwich action, bro!"

Rigby looked up from the kitchen table to see an overweight, green, sweaty human. "Oh, hey muscle man. You can have it."

"Alright!" He said, reaching for the sandwich and taking a bite. A grin crept across his face, showing the food in his mouth. "You know who _else _can have it? My mom!" Muscle man laughed obnoxiously, spitting out little bits of sandwich onto the table.

Rigby took a deep breath in and sighed it out, ignoring Muscle Man's catch-phrase-joke. Seeing the lack of reaction, Muscle Man slammed the sandwich down on the table.

"Dude, what is wrong with you, bro? Is this about Eileen having a date? She's not even hot, dude." Muscle Man said.

Rigby pursed his lips. "I-"

"Dude, Rigby. If you're that bummed out about it, just spy on her tonight, bro. Chicks dig a clingy guy." Muscle Man said, reclaiming the sandwich.

"Ugh, Muscle Man, that is a…." Rigby's eyes knitted together before opening widely. "Totally awesome idea!"

"You know it, bro" Muscle Man said, mouth half full of sandwich.

Rigby stood up from the table and raced out of the kitchen. "Thanks, Muscle Man!"

"No probs, bro!" Muscle Man called out.

Rigby ran up the stairs to Benson's office, and flung open the door. Benson scowled at him and held up a hand. "Yes, sir. Of course. No, sir, I would nev- Of course, sir."

Seeing Benson on the phone, Rigby took a seat across from his desk and waited for him to finish the call.

"Alright sir, thank you. Good bye." Benson said, hanging up the phone. He let out a small groan and rubbed his temples. "What do you want, Rigby." He said, statement more than question.

"Well, you know how we finished our jobs so quick today?" He said, a small smile on his lips.

Benson narrowed his eyes and sighed. "Yeah… for the first time since you've worked here."

"Yeah! Well, I wondered if I could borrow the cart tonight." His eyes full of anticipation.

Benson grimaced and frowned. "Absolutely not!"

Rigby instantly deflated, before becoming defensive. "Dude, Benson! Why not?" He whined.

"Because, Rigby. Every time you take the cart, _something_ gets destroyed. I am not letting it happen again! Mr Maellard _isn't_ going to keep paying for repairs!"

"But Benson, I need it for-"

"He needs it for spying on Eileen." Mordecai said, casually walking in.

"What!" Benson yelled.

"Dude! Come on! I was this close!" Rigby said, holding up his first two fingers close together.

"No, you weren't. You weren't even this close." Benson grumbled, flinging his arms apart.

"Ugh! It's your stupid party shirt, Mordecai. It's the only shirt you ever wear!" Yelled Rigby, pointing at Mordecai's shirt.

Benson held up his hands. "Alright you two. I don't know what's going on, or why Rigby wants to spy on Eileen. I also don't care. However, Rigby, you _did _finish your jobs on time, and I want to encourage that behaviour. So you can borrow the cart."

Rigby, suddenly forgetting his frustrations with Mordecai let out an excited hiss-like "yes!" and high-fived his best friend.

Benson rolled his eyes forcefully and crossed his arms. "But you have to have it back by 10 tonight. I'm serious, Rigby."

Rigby turned from his celebrations and nodded. "You got it, Benson!"

"You better 'got it', Rigby. Or else, you're _fired!" _Benson said, pointing an accusing finger at Rigby.

At 8.30pm, a hoodied Rigby followed Eileen from the coffee shop, where she had been picked up, to Lookout Mountain. He silently thanked Mordecai and Margaret for telling him where Eileen would be picked up before they left for their date.

"They _probably _won't be back til tomorrow morning." Rigby thought, reminding himself of Mordecai's first kiss with Margaret at the very location he was headed.

Rigby parked behind some bushes a distance away from where Eileen and her date were parked. They were still getting equipment out of the car; a large telescope, a few notepads and a blanket. Seeing that they were settling down on a patch of grass and putting equipment into action, Rigby leapt from bush to bush to find his optimal hiding place. He finally settled on a small bush a couple of meters away from Eileen and her date.

"Look at him. So smug. I bet he's a total loser." Rigby whispered under his breath. He looked closer at Eileen's date and gasped. "That's that Tuck Packerd guy! From when we did that stupid phone number dare! Ugh!"

The blonde, muscular man looked around. "Eileen, did you hear something?"

Eileen looked up from her notepad and paused, eyes searching the area around her. "Mmm, nope. I don't think so." She paused again before letting out an excited yell and pointing to the sky, talking about relative distance between stars.

Rigby watched them through squinted eyes, muttering insults under his breath every few seconds. He hated how chivalrous Tuck was being; keeping a fair distance between them, laughing politely at her jokes, and responding to Eileen's 'star jabber' intelligently.

A sinking feeling crept over Rigby the longer he watched them. Eileen seemed like she was having a good time with Tuck. Laughing, talking about things that interest her. Things Rigby figured he could never compete with. He sighed deeply and broke his gaze from them behind his bush. His shoulders slumped as he stood up, making his way back to the cart. He walked slowly, not even minding if people saw him He pulled out his phone, and checked the time.

"Wow. Not even 9.30. Hope Eileen has a good time on her date." He said quietly as he got into the cart. He took one last look over to Eileen and starting the cart, drove back to the park.

* * *

Rigby pulled in to the driveway of the house and slumped out of the cart. He pulled his body up the stairs and opened the door. Walking into the lounge room, he threw himself on the sofa and stared at the ceiling.

"Oh, Rigby! Hello!" Pops said, walking in from the kitchen.

"Hey Pops." Rigby replied.

"Rigby, I thought you were going to be out late tonight, spying on Eileen! Good show!" Pops said, a giddy smile on his face.

Rigby sighed. "I wasn't _spying_, I was making sure the guy she was going out with wasn't a jerk."

Pops paused. "That's not what Muscle Man told me. He said, you were going to spy on her, because you're infatuated with her."

Rigby sat up straight and looked directly at Pops. "I don't even know what _infatuated_ means!" He said, dragging out the word. "All I know is, Eileen is cool. She likes video games, and she's really smart. She doesn't care if people think she's weird, and…. It's stupid, but even with her glasses…. She's pretty."

Pops stood in front of Rigby with a small smile. "Well why don't you tell her all these wonderful things?"

Rigby rolled his eyes and threw his hands in the air. "No way, Pops! I don't-"

"You don't have to tell me, I already heard." A voice said from behind him.

Turning around slowly, Rigby was met with Eileen, standing at the front door. "Eileen! I… Dude, why aren't you on your date?"

Eileen snorted. "It wasn't a romantic date. There's a strict "no dating" rule in the astronomy club. It would take us away from our research!" She paused. "Besides, I saw you spying on us. You're not very inconspicuous."

Rigby's mouth was agape as Pops patted Rigby on the shoulder. "I think I'll just go to bed."

Rigby and Eileen stood in silence, looking at the floor as Pops walked up the stairs. As soon as he was gone, Eileen looked up towards Rigby.

"So… did you really mean everything you said?" Eileen questioned.

"Uh. I uh. I… yeah." Rigby replied, defeated.

"Oh, Rigby." Eileen said, walking over to Rigby and throwing her arms around him. "All you had to do was tell me."

With that, Eileen lent in and placed a gentle kiss on Rigby's cheek.

Rigby smiled and blushed. "Totally worth it."


End file.
